A pile of stones

One of my favorite things to do when I am home is to open my closet door, peer up onto the shelf filled with my old journals, and choose a random one to read.  I dust off the front cover, delicately open the pages and take a deep breath.  I have to be in just the right mood to do this because its as if I relive the feelings and emotions I felt when I was writing them.  These journals are filled with my heartfelt prayers, petitions, questions, and pondering thoughts to the Lord that I've had over the past 9 years of my life.  Each journal leads me on a stroll down memory lane, each one filled with joys, heartaches, silly stories, and many tear-stained pages.  

Last night, I pulled down a journal from exactly two years ago.  I couldn't help but chuckle as I read about my fears and insecurities about my upcoming internship that summer.  I winced as I read about my sin-sick heart that was struggling to meet with God in the midst of college distractions.  I smiled as I read about the Lord's sweetness in walking with me.  I relived each and every word and was left with a gentle peace hovering over my heart as I was reminded once again of the reason that I journal.

I journal because my heart is sick with sin.  I journal because I can often sort through my thoughts on paper better than I can inside my mind. I journal because I am so quick to forget the faithfulness of my God.  How often do we pray a quick prayer in a moment of desperation and then forget to thank Him for the results?  How often do we see answered prayer all around us and forget the agonizing hours we spent praying for a miracle?  How often do we forget the many times Jesus has taken care of each and every detail of our stressful situations?  Oh friends, I forget more often than not.  And that is why I journal.

The book of Joshua tells of Joshua's command to the Israelites to build a stone wall.  He says, "That this may be a sign among you.  When your children ask in time to come, 'What do those stones mean to you?' then you shall tell them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord.  When it passed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off.  So these stones shall be to the people of Israel a memorial forever...so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the hand of the Lord is mighty that you may fear the Lord your God forever." (4:6-7, 24).

God told them to build a wall so they could be reminded of His faithfulness.  I pray that my private journal and my public blog will serve as a little pile of stones, proclaiming the faithfulness of Jesus Christ.  My greatest prayers is that as you follow my next journey to the far side of the sea that you will be left in awe of Jesus, not Abby. 

Jesus Christ is in charge of this journey.  He is the Author, the Orchestrator,  and the Conductor.  And I pray that as you watch this weak, home-loving, sin-sick girl journey with Him to a far, far away place--that Jesus will make much of Himself and show us all that He is who He says He is, He will do what He says He will do, and He can be trusted.  What a joy and privilege it is to be on this journey with Him.

With that being said...8 days until it begins again! That means in approximately 10 days, I'll once again be face to face with that big blue building.  I'll be barging through those doors and scooping up as many babies as I can possibly hold while dancing around the room in a joy-filled frenzy.  Okay, so I realize it probably will not be as climatic as I'm dreaming in my head...but can you tell I'm excited?

10 days until I'm back at my home on the far side of the sea, and I couldn't be more thankful.

And thank you, dear ones, for being part of the journey.