In Recent Days

Dear Ones,

Please forgive me for my lack of communication over the past few weeks.  I came "home" from Hong Kong with a heavy heart to say the least.  Leaving my sweet little buddy in the hospital was excruciating.  I left him in very good hands, though.  A precious girl who lives at his foster home (and happens to be his preschool teacher) came to take my place.  He loves Chelsea and was delighted for her to come stay with him.  But tears were streaming down both of our faces when the time came to say goodbye.  I think I've felt a sliver of what a mom would feel, leaving her baby in an unknown and painful situation.  I could barely breathe as I walked away hearing his cries echo down the hallway.  Mom, I haven't given you enough credit.  Thank you for letting me follow HIM to an unknown and sometimes painful place.  I never realized how much it must make your heart ache.

During my time in HK, I got word that my precious grandmother, Mimi, had gone to be with Jesus.  She was so ready to see Him and had been talking about it for weeks.  She was 97 years old and had lived a full life, but the reality of death is shocking no matter how prepared we think we are.  Perhaps thats because we were not created for death.  "He has put eternity into man's heart" Ecclesiastes 3:11.  We were created with a longing for "always" in our hearts because we were created for eternity. Endings hurt.  They are a shocking reminder of our frailty, our existence marred by sin.  But, we cling to the hope we have in Jesus.  That one days, there will be no more endings.  No more painful goodbyes.  No more separation.  No more tears.  And until then, I take great delight in knowing that my Mimi is fuller than she's ever been.  She is dancing with her King.  And in that reality, there is no room for tears.  But here...there is plenty room.  And I've cried my fair share in the past few weeks.  I made the gut-wrenching decision not to go home for Mimi's funeral.  Everything in my heart was screaming to "GO!"...I wrestled with the Lord and sought much advice, but at the end of the day, I didn't feel a peace about going.  So I stayed and experienced another "first"...being away from home during the death and funeral of a loved one.  It hurt.  But He is my unchanging Rock.  Mimi's life is worth celebrating.  She was a precious, precious woman who impacted numerous lives.  Now, her life has been celebrated on two continents!

I was relieved to finally be "home" after two weeks of crazy.  My heart was weary and it was a great comfort to be greeted at the airport by 5 Martin kiddos, Steve, and Becca.  I've missed this place :) We've had a pretty normal week and I'm thankful for the seemingly mundane pace of life.  He is abundant peace and exceeding joy.