Please take a moment to...Hahahaha!

As I spent time with my new friends last night, I couldn't help but notice how much joy and laughter filled their home.  It was absolutely delightful! And I was reminded...life with the Almighty is...FUN!  I think sometimes we (I) get so bogged down in the seriousness of life (specially in the midst of difficult times), that I forget that my Prince is FUN! And life with Him is full of excitement and laughter.  There is never a dull moment...and that should make us giddy with glorious anticipation! He fills our homes (or dorm rooms) with joy and laughter.  He loves:

• Deep, belly giggles
• Sunny days
• Singing birds
• Tickle fests
• Huge smiles
• Excited squeals
• Pitter-pattering lil' feet
• Long hugs
• "I love yous"
• Silly jokes
• Skipping
• Breathtaking flowers
• Sweet aromas
• Family dinners
• Long chats
• Tears of joy
• Encouraging notes
• The sound a baby makes when he eats something delightfully sweet

He is creator of all.these.things and He takes great delight in seeing His Children S-M-I-L-E!

So if you haven't done so today, please...take some time and LAUGH.  You know, that deep belly laughter that creates abdominal muscles.  Its good for the soul :)

Divine Appointment

I wanted to share a a glorious appointment my Prince ordained for me yesterday.  A few weeks ago, I mentioned meeting a family at the international fellowship who are from Atlanta.  They are a precious, beautiful family.  I had the wonderful privilege of going to their home last night for dinner (after I texted the mom and practically begged her to let me come..haha!).  But let me say, my Prince knew that this divine appointment needed to be scheduled as soon as possible.  Because you know what?  It just so happens that this family is passionate about orphan care.  And it just so happens that this family is involved with an orphanage about 1.5 hours from Chengdu.  And it just so happens that this family has a blessed relationship with the orphanage director and they visit the precious children at this home quite often.  And it just so happens that I'm tagging along next week! Oh glorious day! I am still beaming from ear to ear.  Oh how He loves to take care of details.  We all sat there in amazement as Cary and I began to share our hearts with each other.  We were both squealing with delight.  His heart is for the orphan, folks.  And He loves ordaining divine appointments between like-minded children in order to accomplish His tasks!

Just a sweet little reminder that we are His workmanship, created in Him for good works, which He prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:20. 

Hallelujah, what a mighty One we serve!

The End of Myself

Another week has gone by and its time for a new blog post.  I feel like so much happens in one week, so my greatest challenge is choosing what to share with you, my precious friends and warriors.  I could spend all my time writing about what is physically happening in my life, ins and outs of my life in China.  Or I could spend all my time sharing the insides of my heart.  Both are good, and both are full. So I'll try my best to balance the two. And just a warning....this is an extremely long post :)

Last week was by far the hardest week I've had in China.  I decided I must have had the "I've-been-in-China-for-seven-weeks-blues".  Haha.  I felt pounded all week.  Thing after thing kept happening to remind me of how far away I actually am (from my earthly home).  Room selection and registration at Berry started this week, so last week was filled with preparations for that.  Its quite a challenge trying to figure out my schedule and rooming situation (for my SENIOR year...yikes) from the other side of the world.  Emails are not ideal for those type of details.  Not to mention the 12 hour time difference.  I'm awake when my world at home is asleep.  I also had two dear friends who were going through very very very tough situations last week.  Situations in which, if I had been at home, I would have been at their house sitting on their bed crying and eating peanut m&ms with them.  So, being this far away made me feel utterly helpless.  It broke my heart to know that my friends were in such pain, yet I couldn't even offer a hug.

There wasn't one single thing that made last week hard, but it was just a culmination of lots of emotions and inward struggles.  And the week of bitterly cold, rainy days didn't help.  I found myself feeling very homesick and sad.  Sometimes I just long for the smells of home.  Yummy candles, supper cooking in the evenings, coffee in the morning, fresh laundry...you know, just home-smells.  I know it sounds silly, but I'm being honest about my homesickness issue.  I really feel like its a thorn in my side sometimes.  It keeps me humble and reminds me of HIS strength.

I cried a lot this week.  I also spent a lot of time feeling really guilty for being homesick.  The first few weeks, I felt pretty justified being homesick.  But, I'm in week 8 now. I should be getting adjusted.  It should be getting easier.  I should be getting hang of this, right?  I keep asking myself, "Why don't I let Him be enough?  Why am I not allowing Him to comfort me?  Why do I keep failing?  Why can't I pull it together?"  I spent a lot of time in glorious prayer.  ...a little rabbit trail really quick.  I just want to say that the Psalmist knew what he was talking about when he said, "For a day in your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere." I have seen this to be true more than ever lately.  Nothing can compare to spending time in the presence of the Almighty, weeping at His feet, crying out for strength, reading His love letter to us.  It is truly truly truly where contentment and peace is found.

I mentioned last week that I'm reading a book called Absolute Surrender by Andrew Murray.  Well, my sweet Prince ordained this week's reading to be freshly anointed for my soul (imagine that).  I can't summarize the whole book (but I highly recommend you find yourself a copy and indulge in the glorious truths found there!).  But I do want to share some excerpts that have ministered to my weary soul this week.  They all find their root in Matthew 19:26, "But J looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with G, all things are possible." Did you catch that?  All things.  All things.  All things. Even absolute surrender.  Even victory over homesickness.  Even victory over fear.  Even freedom from worry.  Even release from bondage.  Even the most impossible thing you can imagine.  All things are possible.  But in order for this to happen, we must be brought to the end of ourselves.  We must be completely and utterly empty and helpless.  To the point where we realize that we absolutely cannot accomplish anything that He asks of us without His supernatural power invading every crook and crevice of our lives.

"Your religious life is every day to be proof that G works impossibilities; your religious life is to be a series of impossibilities made possible and actual by G's almighty power.  That is what we need.  We have an almighty G that we worship, and we must learn to understand that we do not need a little of G's power, but we need the whole of G's omnipotence to keep us right."

"The cause of the weakness of your Chr*stian life is that you want to work it out partly, and to let G help you.  And that cannot be.  You must come to be utterly helpless, to let G work, and G will work gloriously.  It is this that we need if we are indeed to be workers of G."

He cannot use me fully while I still think Abby has some power.  If I am still believing that I have the capability to please Him in my own strength, then I am really of no use to Him.  Because without His supernatural strength and grace...I am capable of nothing except sin.  But my, or should I say, our downfall is that most of us don't fully realize this.  We don't allow him to have complete control because we don't realize our utter helplessness.  Somehow, we think that if we try hard enough, that if feel close enough to Him, that if we have our quiet time every day--that we'll be strong enough to accomplish all He asks of us.  Not True.  This is why Philippians 2:17 says, "For it is HIM who works in you, both to will and to work His good pleasure."  Its all Him. Our best efforts still aren't enough.  It has to be supernatural.  Its called surrender.

Paul said, "I was with you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling...and my preaching was demonstration of the Spirit and of Power." (1 Cor 2:3)  "From the human side there was feebleness, from the divine side there was divine omnipotence.  And that is true of every godly life; and if we would only learn that lesson better, and give a wholehearted undivided surrender to it, we should learn what blessedness there is in dwelling every hour and every moment with an almighty G."

Even Paul felt weak, feeble, and helpless.  Even Paul felt like he couldn't go on.  But it was in those moments of his utter weakness and helpless when the power and majesty of the Almighty was displayed.  What a relief! What a burden lifted from my shoulders! I can stop trying to be strong. Because I'll never be strong enough.  I'll never be able to love people well enough.  I will never be able to be completely selfless.  I will never be able to be bold enough.  And even if I feel closer to my Prince than I've ever felt in my life, I still won't be able to accomplish all these things.  You know why?  Because its all Him. Only when I am brought to the end of myself and I finally realize my helplessness, can HIS POWER invade my life and empower me to tackle these supernatural feats with VICTORY! Hallelujah, there is victory!!!

I don't know if any of this makes much sense.  Trust me, Andrew Murray does a much better job of explaining these truths than I do.  But, I have found much comfort and relief in the realization that my helplessness is actually a stepping stone to victory.  Being brought to the end of myself is actually a blessing.  I still have a lot to learn (and I mean a whole lot).  And I am still wrestling through a lot of these truths.  But I desperately want to learn this lesson.  I want to be invaded by the holy spirit in a way I never knew was possible.  I want to live an impossible life of triumph and victory.  Learn with me, friends?

May we relish in His sweetness today.  May we be ever ravished by the Almighty One. May we take delight in our weaknesses, for it is when we come to the end of ourselves, realizing our utter helplessness, can His power truly be manifested.

"Let us receive this as the first great lesson in the spiritual life: It is impossible for me; let there be an end of the flesh and all its powers, an end of self, and lot it be my glory to be helpless."

"Be not afraid that He will command from you what He will not bestow"

"For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:30

P.S- if anyone is actually still reading this, PROPS to you! I am humbled that you stuck with my rambling for this long :) The next post will be lighter, I promise!  Love from the far side! 

Just love people

 

  你好 sweet friends and warriors!

Yep, the pictures don't lie.  That is a monkey sitting on my head.  China just keeps getting more and more fun!

I was a rebel this weekend.  I, Abby Elizabeth Akridge the first, skipped school on Friday.  Yes I know, you can’t believe it.  But its true and I don’t regret one second of it :)  Me and 5 other friends went on a weekend adventure to Le Shen and Mt. Emei.  On Friday, we visited a huge statue of buddha.  On Saturday, we spent the day hiking Mt. Emei.  I've never been on a "real" hike before...but I figured China is a good place to start! And as you can see, the hike included lots of monkeys.  The monkeys are terrifying, really.  When they are released every morning, they begin coming out from everywhere.  And they aren't really nice.  We spent a lot of time screaming and running away.  There were ladies with huge sticks and sling shots who beat the monkeys off the tourists (quite comical if you think about it...).  It was quite the experience...worth a trip to China!  

The hike was beautiful. Definitely some of the most breathtaking scenery I've ever seen.  I was once again in awe of my Prince.  The Heavens declare His glory.  Unfortunately, we didn't actually make it to the top of the mountain.  We took a bus to the "almost top" , but when we arrived, it was SO COLD, icy and foggy that we couldn't go any farther.  

Here are a few pictures from the weekend:

Devin and Molly!

It was wonderful to spend time with Molly.  My heart is very burdened for this precious girl.  She has the idea that having a boyfriend and money will bring her happiness.  I long to tell her about my Prince and the true joy that is found only in Him.  We were able to talk some on Saturday evening.  Now my job is to love her well.  

Love her well.  What does it mean to love someone well?  We are so quick to say the words, "I love you".  I am quick to tell everyone I love them.  But I have been very challenged lately about the true meaning of love.  I have always thought I was really good at loving people. But as I'm coming face to face with my sinfulness (as explained in earlier posts), I am beginning to see how poorly I actually love.  Its so easy to love people who love me back.  Its so easy to love people who are like me.  Its so easy to love people who have the same values and morals.  Its easy to love cute, innocent babies.  But what about the people who annoy me?  What about those who are rude or inconsiderate?  What about those who I feel take advantage of me?  What about those who are just plain different from myself?  How do I respond to those people?  

It is purely impossible to love well in my own power.  I am such a poor representation of my Prince.  But, Praise Him! For He "pours His love into our hearts." Romans 5:5.  Its not a work of Abby to love people.  Its a work of JC living in Abby.  

Love is essential.  "The fruit of the Spirit is Love." Galatians 5:  "As I have loved you...love one another." John 13:34,   "If we love one another, He dwells in us" 1 John 4:12. 

What if we stopped trying to convince people to believe and instead began loving? What would our world look like if we began to take time to allow Him to guide our thoughts and actions?  Before we respond in a harsh tone.  Before we let out that long sigh of annoyance.  Before we become withdrawn and grumpy.  What if we allowed Him to pour His love into our hearts, giving us power to love the unloveable.  

By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:35

Right before I left for China, I visited a sweet little cafe near my town.  The walls were adorned with signs that said:

Just love people

Lets take that advice this week, sweet friends.  Let us bow before the throne, begging to be emptied of ourselves...and begging to be filled with a love that can only come from above. May this love fill our hearts and overflow into our lives...and may we learn to love well. 

Only in China...

The past five weeks have been filled with many new experiences.  Some of them have been somewhat normal, or at least expected experiences.  Some of them have left me shaking my head and saying, "Only in China..."  This blog is dedicated to those moments :)

Only In China...

·         Does Mcdonalds taste like a gourmet meal

·         Can you drive backwards on a freeway exit ramp and it be perfectly acceptable

·         Are there footprints on the toilet seat in public restrooms

·         Do you have to dodge spit bullets every time you go in public

 ·         Is crossing the street like a game of human frogger

·         Can you buy bouquets of bears

·         Do you get hit on by five middle eastern men in one class period

·         Can you eat a McDonalds big mac and a dairy queen blizzard in the same meal and not feel guilty

·         Do you say, “I need to take my computer tonight so I can look up information about dragons.”

·         Do cats roam the halls of dormitory buildings…and no one cares

·         Do you go to an amusement park and find that YOU are the biggest attraction

·         Do you find sausage links hanging out with the laundry

·         Do you hear the song “Last Christmas” blasting in a department store…in March

·         Do seals dance with humans to the theme song of Titanic.

 

 These funny little cultural differences have definitely taken some getting used to.  But I know these are the very things I will cherish in my heart when my time in China comes to an end. 

I love China :)

Hello Dear Ones!

What a joy it is to be writing to you on this Sunday afternoon.  Its chilly and cloudy outside, but I cling to the promise that I need no other sunshine than the Sunshine of His face! It warms my heart and fills my spirit overflowing. 

This week has been a good one, there's never a dull moment on this side of the sea (or on any side of the sea, for that matter...if you're following you know who).  So, I have an announcement to make....I officially have one Chinese friend! Woop Woop!  Her name is Molly.  She's 18 and a senior in highschool...and I'm in love with her! A friend introduced us, and we're going to be "language partners".  That means we'll get together periodically and practice speaking English and Chinese.  We met on Tuesday for the first time.  We had lunch together and had planned on studying all afternoon.  However, Miss Molly does not like to study.  She said, "Let's go shopping first..then we'll study!"  So, she looped her arm into mine and off we went...crowded buses, busy shopping centers, lots of stares..the whole nine yards.  I even talked Molly into getting her ears pierced! So fun.  She introduced me to lots of new Chinese snacks and delicacies and I got a firsthand Chinese shopping experience.  We ended the afternoon by meeting up with some of my friends for dinner...needless to say, we didn't get much studying done.  Maybe next time! ;) 

Molly and me on our shopping adventure

On Tuesday evening, my sweet friend Devin and I made our way to a local coffee shop to share testimonies with each other.  It was such a blessed time together! There is so much power in sharing your story.  We both just sat there and cried together...basking in His faithfulness.  If you haven't shared your story lately, I highly encourage you to.  Or at least spend some time thinking about what you've been brought from and where He's taking you.  Its good for the heart.
On Wednesday evening, after a long day of classes, some Thai girls in our dormitory wanted to cook dinner for me and Devin.  It was so fun and delicious.  The Thai girls don't speak English and we obviously don't speak Thai, so we had to communicate with what little Chinese we know.  It was quite comical..and we spend majority of the time giggling and awkwardly staring at each other.  Only in China! I'm so excited and thankful for the opportunity to have friends from so many nations.

On Thursday evening, my friend Amanda and I went over to the home of a couple from America.  They were so warm and welcoming! They even cooked us a western meal of chicken Alfredo and chocolate chip cookies!  It was such a refreshing time and chatting and fellowship.  My heart was light as we left.
On Friday, a group of us (including Molly) went to a Chinese aquarium! It was oh so much fun.  There were polar bears, seals, walruses, sea lions, penguins...you name it.  But I'm not sure if the animals or the foreigners were the bigger attraction.  At one point, we had about 20 middle-schoolers gathered around us taking pictures and screaming "You are beautiful!" in their cute accents.  Gooooood day.

Pictures with the foreigners!

 

 

Ohhh China :)

On Saturday, Devin and I spent the whole day with my Chinese host family.  They picked us up at 9am and we attended an art lesson.  Then, Baba (dad) pulled out some maps of the city and showed us places we should visit.  I had packed some uno cards and the game was quite a hit with Didi (little brother).  He was really good! We had lunch together and then attended a festival for a minority group's holiday.  After afternoon tea, we went shopping at an antique market and then had dinner.  It was a great, long day.  Devin and I enjoyed getting to know the family.  They were so welcoming and gracious to us all day. 

Baba, Devin, Me, Ma ma, Art Teacher, Little Brother, Little Nephew

So there you have it.  A full week in Zhongguo.  Now for an afternoon of studying! May He give me joy even in that. :)  There is so much on my heart that I desperately want to share...but for various reasons, I cannot.  Please continue the prayers and know that big things are happening on this side of the sea.  Even if the biggest things are within my little ole' sinful heart. I continue to wonder why my best friend continues to pursue me, when I am constantly breaking His heart.  I am a big mess of unbelief.  But this morning, He reminded me of Peter, who denied his best friend three times and continued to doubt...yet he was the rock for future generations.  He loves big messes like us. Oh, heal our unbelief!

I will leave you with a few quotes from Absolute Surrender by Andrew Murray.  Its rocking my world.

Be not afraid that He will command from you what He will not bestow.

At every tea-table you see it.  Why is tea poured into that cup? Because its empty, and given up for the tea.  But put ink, or vinegar, or wine into it, and will they pour the tea into the vessel?  And can He fill you, can He bless you if you are not absolutely surrendered to Him? He cannot.

Lots of love from the far side,

Abby

I got a package, I got a package, I got a package Hey Hey Hey Hey!!!!

Got my first package today!

Sweet little tastes of home.

I am one happy girl.

One Month!

Hello to all my faithful warriors


I apologize for my delay in writing a new post! I've got a lot on my heart this afternoon, so I'll try to condense all the thoughts and emotions into a sensible post...but bear with me :)


Yesterday marked my one month anniversary in China! To be honest, it seems like I've been here a whole year already.  I feel like time moves slower here in the far side...but maybe that's still the "adjustment phase" talking.  Some days are really really good.  Some days are really really hard.  Today is a hard day.  Just being honest.
My first week of classes has been...good and challenging.  Monday was pretty hard just getting back into the swing of school days.  I realized that I haven't been in school in almost 3 months!  I suppose I forgot about the daily grind of classes and homework.  My Chinese class is a little overwhelming.  I'm staring in Elementary level 2.  So its still a beginner level, but starting in book two.  I was overwhelmed by the characters.  Its just so hard to learn and remember all the characters for the words.  I'm praying for supernatural memory power!   Tuesday was better school-wise, and I think I'll get into the swing of things soon.  Here's my daily school schedule:
Monday: 8:30-12- Chinese
Tuesday: 10:30-12-Chinese 2-3:30 Chinese
Wednesday: 8:30-12 Chinese 1:30-4:30- Chinese Religion
Thursday: 8:30-12 Chinese 1:30-4:30 Chinese Culture
Friday 10:20-12 Chinese

So, as you can see...it's a lot of hours in a physical classroom.  And that doesn't count the hours of homework! I'm trying to figure out the best way for me to memorize the characters.  So far, I've discovered that writing on my bathroom wall with a dry erase marker is working pretty well.  That way, I can erase and write again..erase and write again...erase and write again. :)  It is exciting to see the progress though.  I feel like I have already improved some in one week!

On Saturday evening, the Asia Learn students went to a dinner where we were paired with Chinese "host families".  My family consists of a Dad, Mom and little brother.  My didi (little brother) is seven years old and quite possibly the cutest kid ever! He was so excited to meet his new jie jie and ge ge (big sister and big brother). It was really fun having dinner with my new family, they seem really nice and welcoming.  I am hanging out with then again next weekend and looking forward to being shown around the city with a local family.  I pray we can build a lasting relationship.

I've given you a brief overview of my life from the outside.  Everything seems to be falling into place as I witness His faithfulness first hand.  Every moment of every day, He is faithful.  My "inside" life isn't quite as orderly! Its filled with ups and downs, twists and turns.  I'll try to explain.

One thing I'm learning is this: sin does not evaporate just because we change locations.  I think we sometimes have a glamorized view of life abroad.  We label those people who move abroad as "heroes" (and they definitely are, because there are being obedient to the Call).  But I think we (or at least I) view them as spiritual giants who never struggle with selfishness, laziness, or pride.  Life is hard, but they completely trust Him every moment.  We all wish we could be as good as they are.  We wish we were that close to Him.  Don't get me wrong, I love to read about and observe the lives of many faith heroes.  We can learn a lot from them.  But, they are still sinful humans in need of a Savior.  Am I making any sense?

I have followed my Best Friend to the far side of the sea.  I was obedient in taking one small step towards Him.  But I am still Abby Elizabeth Akridge, the sinner.  Abby, saved by His grace alone.  I am still trapped in a body of sin and selfishness and I still cave to those sinful tendencies more often than I ever want to admit.  Moving to China has not healed my tendency toward laziness.  It has not healed my sin of loving home and comforts more than Him.  It has not healed my desire to be in charge of my life.  It has not healed my impatience, my pride, or my self-pity.  Maybe I thought that moving here would automatically make me closer to Him.  It has, but I have to fight for it.  My natural tendency is not to run into His arms when I'm shaking with homesickness.  My natural tendency is not to wake up an hour early to spend time in His presence.  My natural tendency is not to give my time and energy to building relationships with people with whom I have nothing in common.  And even though I've followed Him to China, my natural tendency is not even to seek out relationships with local people.  My natural tendency is still toward sin...and I still have to fight daily.  For my battle is not not against flesh and blood.  My battle is against a nasty enemy who wants nothing more than to see me defeated.  He would love for me to come to China and to still live a life of shallow mediocrity.  It's possible.  That's why we must fight. My friends, we must fight.  We cannot roll over and play dead in our journey with Him.  Taking one step towards Him is just beginning.  We must fight the good fight every day.    A change in location does not heal our sinful hearts.  Only the Healer himself can heal a heart that is torn apart by wickedness.  Only the Healer can take a weak, dirty, selfish mess and make it a masterpiece.

Stay dressed for action and keep your lamps burning, and be like men who are waiting for their master to come home from the wedding feast, so that they may open the door to him at once when he comes and knocks.

Luke 12:35-36

May we stay dressed for action always, allowing Him to gird us with the full armor so that we will be ready to take our stand against the attacks of the enemy.

Please continue to pray over my homesickness.  The bouts are becoming fewer and fewer (Praise Him!)...but they still come.  I try to take every battle to His feet in surrender, but sometimes the battles are very fierce.  I am so thankful  that I have a home to be homesick for.  I have a mommy and a daddy.  I have a place to go to at the end of these 6 months.  There are approximately 147 million children who don't have that.  They live in an eternal state of homesickness.  I am feeling an ounce of their pain...and its excruciating.  Please pray fervently for those precious ones.  

Also, please pray that my Best friend will introduce me to some local friends, and that I will be obedient to His gentle nudging in seeking them out.  I don't want staying comfortable to be an option.

I was talking to my dear friend Ellen last week and I said, "I just feel so weak.  I wish I could be strong.."  And she said, "Really?  Why would you ever want that.  If you were strong, you would have no need for Him."  Wise words.  I am so weak.  He is so strong.  Hallelujuah!

Well, there you have it. My heart is all over the place! 

LOTS of love from the far side!